In Zimbabwe, gender roles dictate that women should submit to their family members. When married, women are expected to obey their husbands, act according to their wishes, and never challenge them in decision-making. They are seen as disobedient and rebellious if they challenge their husbands in decision-making. Several laws have been implemented to promote women’s rights, but cultural norms remain an obstacle to achieving gender equality. Sharon Ndlovu says that her marriage has been a nightmare and regrets marrying. She says that ever since she got married, her husband’s brothers have treated her like their maid, and whenever she tries to address the problems with her husband, the husband ignores her or accuses her of hating his siblings. She says life has not been easy for her as she must clean after four older men and still ensure her two children are cared for. ‘I cry alone at night, wondering if things will ever improve. My husband treats me like a nobody; whenever l ask him to find our place to live, he raises his voice for everyone to hear, and his brothers accuse me of trying to separate them. Sharon says I hardly have time to breathe because l am always on my toes, either doing laundry or house chores.
Sharon says that before she got married, she used to work as a shop teller, but when she got married, her husband said she should stop working and look after the children. As young women growing up in a patriarchal environment in Zimbabwe, we are taught to bow down to our husbands, and we fear walking away from our miserable marriages in fear of being judged by our communities. The patriarchal and cultural norms give men too much power, making women passive. Growing up, we were taught to be resilient, and in marriage, we should preserve ourselves regardless of our hardships. Cultural norms uphold the view that women are childbearing machines and that men have superior control over women. Women are treated as children and are expected to answer to their husbands and not challenge them.
By Bekezela Mguni